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Founder of carbon dating

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However, by the age of adolescence, it is usually very clear that something is amiss.

"All my friends were either hooking up with hydrogen or plutonium," says one activist for equal rights for carbon daters, "But I just didn't see anything attractive in those elements. It was a hunk of the stable isotope, C13, which is my favorite.

Some critics have asked, "Why not just pick up the carbon and rape it?

I mean, it's not like it's actually alive, it's just a nondescript blob of rock!

However, finding a chunk of carbon is only the beginning.

Once a piece of carbon is found, the dater usually talks to it for several weeks, starting with only saying one sentence or two, then backing off so as not to seem intimidating.

A form of radiometric dating used to determine the age of organic remains in ancient objects, such as archaeological specimens, on the basis of the half-life of carbon-14 and a comparison between the ratio of carbon-12 to carbon-14 in a sample of the remains to the known ratio in living organisms. A technique for measuring the age of organic remains based on the rate of decay of carbon 14.

" Carbon daters usually respond by clearing their throats loudly and pretending not to have heard the question.Of the world's fetishes, carbon dating is one of the most difficult to have, because sexual satisfaction is very hard to come by.Unlike Coprophiliacs, Pedophiles, and animal-lovers, who can ease their horniness by simply grabbing a piece of poop, a rabbit, or traveling to a local preschool for an hour or two, carbon daters often have more difficulty finding ways to sexually satisfy themselves.Often, they actually end up losing the carbon, and if they do, they just pick up a random pebble off the ground and pretend that it's carbon.Proposed legislature in the United States would permanently ban carbon dating in an indirect way, by stating that dating can only take place "Between a human being and Magnesium." Many family organizations have condemned any other type of human-element relationship as sinful, communistic, and helping the Terrorists win. " said one priest, with his wife, a lump of magnesium, at his side.Carbon 14 is continually being created in the Earth's atmosphere by the interaction of nitrogen and gamma rays from outer space.